8th Year – Sacred Sweat Lodge Ceremony

Twice a year Simonskloof Mountain Retreat is host of the Sacred Sweat Lodge Ceremony lead by Native North American – Tim Sikyea. In March & September we gather for up to 2 weeks of Sweat Lodge Ceremony to give thanks to Mother Earth, give gratitude for what she provides so unconditionally. It is a purification ceremony to heal ourselves and remember how fortunate and blessed we are.

You are invited to join in this Sacred Ceremony. You may choose as many sweats you like to take part in. Sweats are by donation – let your heart guide you.

For more info and latest dates, contact: sweatlodgesa@gmail.com or see below for the upcoming Sweat Lodge Ceremony in September 2019 – our 8th year here at Simonskloof:

Mitakuye Oya’cin” – “We are all related”

30 years Kloofing in the Nuy River Gorge

The year 1988

We were just two 18 year old Swiss youngsters in the midst of our apprenticeships: Stephan a Lumberjack and myself an Architectural technician. But the opportunity of adventures way down in South Africa was too great to turn down! So we booked a 8 hour train journey to Luxembourg and the cheapest flight with Luxair to Cape Town. Stephan forged himself a 1.5kg Dundee-style knife, in case we were to encounter angry Lions – Needless to say the flight attendants had a good chuckle when we boarded “sword and all”.

Equipped with a Survey General map of the area, food for only two days and PEP store blankets for “sleeping bags” we explored the NUY RIVER GORGE on route to my Granddad’s farm, Simonskloof here in the Koo Valley. The adventure took three days, hiking old jeep tracks, then endless river crossings, bivouacking on the sandbanks cooking like cowboys on a open fire, the pot coffee and baked beans were missing though. The following day the bushwhacking and boulder hopping continued only to grind us to a halt at a rather magical rock dam half way up the gorge. We camped a second night, running very low on food but filled with an air of epic-ness.

A real adventure

In the morning of day three, after another cold African night wrapped in a thin blanket, we gathered drift wood to make a raft for our backpacks – not knowing that they actually do float, if you wrap them in a rain cover or wet-pack its content… After a 80m swim through icy mountain water, we scrambled several more hours to finally reach the towering wall of Keerom dam. Form there it was a quick 5km hike on Jeep track to my Granddad’s house.

And then some…

After a week on the farm helping with repairing fences we hit the road to the East for a more civilised hike along the well established Fanie Botha hiking trail.

However the Nuy River Gorge was deeply ingrained in my young soul and so a life changing adventure was born!

Now it’s your turn: http://www.simonskloof.com/kloofing/

On Instagram

We’re becoming (almost) instant now…

There was a time of Newsletters, then came Facebook and “now” it’s Instagram… kind off. Words disappear more and more, #’s grab their places, instant global connectivity rises with images becoming the all powerful messenger…

and so Simonskloof has joint the picture crazy community – check us out on: Instagram  <–  Click there!


Orange Cottage 2.0

Originally built in the 1960’s as a 2-bedroom farm worker’s cottage, Orange Cottage’s classic square shaped foot print, can be found in multitude
Main Bedroom @ Orange Cottage on farms from here to Montagu. Back in 1988 it served as our base when visiting granddad here on Simonskloof. Then in 2004, our 5th year, we turned it into our third guest cottage, after Eric’s Place and our famous Faraway Cottage.

Over the years it saw many minor additions: a wood fired Dover stove, Solar heated water, a reed and hessian ceiling, apricot pips around the braai area, an under-counter fridge – mind you, the latter back fired, literally and before we knew it, it simply over heated, I’m working on the ventilation as I type.

Solar lights replaced the sooty paraffin lamps and yet so romantic candles. But they simply darkened all the walls and together with the falling off of plaster and peeling paint, it started to look more like a shack than a cosy cottage. So, in January 2018 straight after the silly season holidays we tackled a serious make over! Fortunately, we had some much needed helping Bathroom at Orange Cottagehands in form of four young WWOOFers (Volunteers) and by the end of January we were done, including a neat reed screen to add privacy when enjoying a bush bath outside. The hot water for the bath is still on the cards and might just arrive in form of a Fire-Bath workshop – watch this space!

The Kitchen top, as well as the entrance door, received a good sanding down and trimming of the scraping bottom, all sealed with three layers of Woodoc. The double bed (Queen size…) finally “lost” its foot-board, making it more comfortable for taller people. The Geckos, however, proved themselves worthy of new speed records and escaped many attempts at being caught – natural insect solutions can’t be tempered with! Hence, please accept the occasional droppings on the wall.

The cottage looks amazing, we are pretty chuffed! The window frames still need some TLC and so does most of the floor, all in good time.

Braai Area @ Orange Cottage

MTB @ Simonskloof

It’s indeed our best kept secret. The first track was made or shall we say discovered already back in 1999, while exploring Simonskloof on a borrowed good old Avalanche Mountain Bike.
We’ve never made much noise about it, but lately there’s been several enquiries which made me realize that there was absolutely zero info on our website.

So here we go, check our latest page on Simonskloof’s MTB Trails with map and description of our 3 MTB trails from 10 to 40km, two of the three are circular routes, with the most scenic views, through remote valleys and up and down some hectic passes. The 20km track offers single track and even some historic ox wagon trails – the very first access into the Keerom valley.

Make sure you have a ice cold beer in the fridge on your return or carry some cash for a Coke and Biltong at Oupa Batt’se Winkel our local farm store along the route.

Photo credits go to Charles Raymond & Cooperfeesh – Thanks Guys!!!

Sacred Sweat Lodge

In 21 days, we’ll be welcoming Tim Sikyea for our Sacred Sweat Lodge Ceremony, now entering its 6th year here at Simonskloof Mountain Retreat.

Please contact Stella at Sweat Lodge sweatlodgesa@gmail.com to book and express your gratitude for Mother Earth’s unconditional Love.

Ultimately we are all related:

Mitakuye Oya’cin

Happy Feet

…Carless vs Careless

Honey badger at SimonskloofWhen last did you walk down to the corner shop for a loaf of bread, a bottle of something cold, a six-pack, some snacks, or the missing boerewors or mushrooms (vegetarians take note) for the impromptu braai???

Is the memory of driving a couple of blocks or even a section of the highway to reach the nearest shopping mall or even your favorite organic grocer in the suburb next door clearer?

The daily school drops with the kids, before spending Toktokkie at Simonskloofendless time in total static rush hour traffic to get to your even more stationary office desk. Mind the 2-3hours drive it took you to get to Simonskloof, dodging 18 wheelers and speeding minibuses along the way.
Sitting in flu inducing air-conditioning, law obeyingly strapped in by your restrictive seatbelt, while losing your favorite radio station’s signal, the more the city fumes give way to fresh country air and blue skies. Then to top it all “Are we there yet…?” or “I need to wee…” from the kids, while your copilot is scanning a smart phone for directions. Finally, ten dusty, bumpy kilometers are all that separates you from your well-deserved, so looked forward, hard earned weekend break – never mind the much-needed car wash before Monday mornings meeting with a prospective client – but let’s not think about work AGAIN!

Take it Slowly Please at Simonskloof Mountain RetreatSo, here you are opening a creaking farm gate, almost as powerful as Emmerich’s Stargate itself, beaming you into another galaxy, some old, really old car wrecks suggests a different era, one of white walled tires and even oxen, be it to pull the stripped “car-cases” to their final resting place or actually dragging the last wooden wagon on its monthly supply trip to the nearest steam train siding. Friendly road signs warn you about the slow creatures of this planet… no more speeding tickets – mind you, the receptionist might hint on your F1 driving style through the last ditch and gives you the checkered finish flag for first place in your personal car race.

You have arrived! … well almost, just another few Let them hang those car keys hundred meter to drive, depending which cottage you stay but NOW:

  • Hang ‘m up, those car keys!
  • Switch off that I-droid – no signal out here!
  • Light your fire…
  • Open that bottle of your finest or brew that cuppa…
  • Lean back, feet UP…
  • Breathe in the fresh mountain air…
  • and take in the endless landscape!

You get the drift: Carless is King or Queen…!

The next morning, after a good night’s sleep – wondering what happened to the neighbor’s Happy Toad at Simonskloofalarm or the noise from the nearby main road, the ice-cream bell (do you still get them?) and the builders racket from the site around the block.

You realize it’s all gone, does not exist, on hold for the next 36 hours at least!

Time for your morning run or yoga session or straight to breakfast with a slow brewed coffee, un-toasted fresh farm bread*, good – real – natural – honey** free range farm eggs***.

* watch this space for our “Weekend with Bread” treats!
** need some real honey from a happy beekeeper? Ask mom at the Honey Cottage!
*** well the eggs never ranged free, but ours are definitely Mongoose friendly, as he seems to get most of them, hence so far none are for sale – sorry!

Blue headed Rock Agama on Gecko Trail - Simonskloof Mountain Retreat

Sooner or later our hiking trails are calling, the little farm dam needs to be explored, the car wrecks beg closer inspection and summon your creative juices for an amateur photo session. The big old oak tree asks for your tree hugging skills and your ancestral connections, eventually will draw you to search for the rock paintings in the kloof.

All quests start right at your doorstep, the very stoep of each cottage is the base of each of these adventures. Your feet are the pivotal point around which activities on Simonskloof revolve. Here, these most remote of body parts are central to your stay, here they experience happiness, be it barefooted on the Campsite lawn, squishing through the mud of the little farm dam, stepping on sharp little pebbles in the rock pools up in the mountain, soaking up sun rays while you lie in the hammock at Faraway and read your favorite novel, toe wriggling with the water taps while enjoying a bush bath at Orange, tiptoeing across the creaking wooden floor of Eric’s, strapped into your hiking boots while hiking the Gecko trail or while finding your rhythm down a rock wall, abseiling into the gorge and ultimately boulder hopping in your Rockys 14 times across the Nuy River – HAPPY FEET!

Happy Feet even the Ants at SimonskloofYour feet keep you slow paced (except for those Iron-men and ladies…) they pick-up your natural beat, they are your connection to the planet, this side of the Wormhole.

Leave those keys hanging, just like Tom Dooley’s head. Leave your car parked, for the weekend – well of course that is, if you’re not heading for the Saturday Morning market down in Montagu or the Protea Farm’s famous tractor ride to the top of the Langeberg…

Simonskloof offers you that happy feet experience, that connection with mother nature, slow enough to spot the little things of life. “Down to Earth” is our terrestrial pursuit after all and so is our appeal at Simonskloof for the understanding and respect of the land, to walk and not drive while staying here – it’s only a 5 – 10 minute walk between cottages and the perceived trail head – remember all trails start at your cottage!

Owls are watching us as we should watch over natureSee the opportunity for your young kids, to gain a deeper insight of what it means to drive or not to drive, to walk or not to walk, the beauty of an ever so unconditional supportive planet earth, down to the smallest unexpected living thing. Yet in a blink of an eye we’d sit in our metal monster, driving over her little creatures, catching the flying ones with our windscreen. At night a car’s headlights become death traps for most night insects or birds of prey. Instead marvel at the endless night sky with its millions of fairy lights, while taking a safe 10 minute stroll home with the chance to discover a porcupine shuffling in the oaks forest looking for penny bun mushrooms or listening to the frogs chattering in the farm dam.

Keep those keys hanging! We, Simonskloof and mother nature will be thankful.

Next time you need another six-pack… hmmm, consider walking, it will grow with every step!

Pet Free Zone

“So, don’t f&#k with me!”What on earth!?, might have been your first reaction, when reading above words… Well, as inappropriate as it might sound at first, it hits the nail straight on the head and in the spirit of 2017 (don’t beat around the bush, say what you mean, mean what you say, get to the point), it is very much Waya’s situation right now.

Our little Waya is heading for that special time of her life, or in Neil Diamond’s words: “Girl you’ll be a woman soon”. Hence, we have to tighten our pet policy, allowing spayed females & neutered K9’s only! If your hound, mutt, canine, dog, mongrel, cur, tyke, doggy, pooch, mong, bitzer, man’s best friend or whatever you call your barking, tail wagging pet, still sports his “family jewels” or if she’s in heat for that matter, they will currently not be allowed at Simonskloof, the latter to make life a bit easier on young Hakan.

The “Dog Free Zone” i.e. no dogs in the cottage bedrooms still stands – for those of you struggling to grasp the reasons why we do not wish to have dogs in the cottage’s bedrooms, it’s very simple: In the last couple of years we equipped our guest cottages with good quality & beautiful linen and down duvets.  Dogs – especially those that sleep or sometimes just jump on the beds are simply damaging the linen and leaving hair behind. This might not be of concern to you at your own home, but having many different guest staying at Simonskloof it does cause a problem, after all, not everyone shares your love or tolerance towards K9’s, some might even have an allergy towards animal hair. Hence we ask you to respect our house rules, they are there for a good reason.

BUT despite all these restrictions, we do still welcome your friendly and well behaved dog. Please make sure you have his/her favorite blanket or traveling dog bed, a leash and collar and food and water bowls packed. Along the road, plan in enough stops for pee-breaks yet keep them under closer control as you never know what he/she might pick up along a harmless looking farm fence. At Simonskloof please keep your pet on a leash when checking in at the reception, as we do have two cats too.

We’re looking forward to welcoming you and your friendly pets at down to earth Simonskloof.